Toxic Positivity: What is it and How can we Make it go Away?

Do you know someone who lives by the motto "Positive Vibes Only?" They are always cheery, always looking on the bright side. They are the life of the party and nothing seems to get them down. You may even think you want to be like them sometimes. Truth be told, I wish I could be like that.

But that would be denying a whole part of me that is sometimes anxious, sad, scared or angry. And although I don't always wish I had those feelings, denying they exist, or feeling like I am "less than" or like something is wrong with me because I have these feelings, makes me also feel lonely and disconnected from others.

When we are not allowed to express these feelings, but are only allowed to show happiness, positivity and cheer, we may be in an environment of "toxic positivity," meaning a place that the expression of authenticity and vulnerability are punished (maybe we will be excluded from events if we are sad or we will be told that we are not a team player at work if we have worries that show up in the office). Friends, bosses, colleagues and even therapists can create these toxic environments. It's not always done intentionally or with malice, but it can nevertheless create a culture that diminishes connection and leaves people feeling unseen and unheard.

So, what can you do about toxic positivity? Click here for 5 ways to avoid toxic positivity and 5 ways to encourage authenticity and vulnerability at work, home or play. If you have questions or want to learn more about how you can support grieving friends, colleagues and clients by creating a culture of authenticity, reach out to me here.